junipersky: (Default)
Yes. I am going to make it to the wedding. Yes, I am going to be able to survive said wedding. No, I am not going to go crazy.

Pray for me please- I'm alright when I don't think about things, but I know that putting it off isn't going to help any. Sometimes all I'm doing is controling the anxiety attacks and trying to prevent them but I know that they're really close at hand. People keep telling me to 'just not worry' about it, but I am physically unable to do that. Maybe not physically. Mentally might be a better word for it. What I /can/ do though, which does help, is to plan and try to find a way to make everything work.

*deep breath*
junipersky: (Ever Curious Kitty)
I just had a good day.

It started out with some bad news- we didn't get the scholarship we had hoped for. So we're going to be draining the trust fund this next year. I'd kinda planned on that (because I'm a wet towel) but it's still upsetting that we didn't get it.

Well, after that I spent some time talking to Mom on the phone. Taylor and I had planned on going to the Temple today, and after the bad news I /really/ wanted to go. Because I think the Temple is the BEST way to get some perspective and heal a sadness. So Taylor and I still went. BEST idea ever. Eternal perspective. A place where the devil has NO power, so everything can really fall into place. I hope, somehow, I can make my home like that because the Temple won't be as accessible. It's a half hour away from where we're thinking of looking rather than just five minutes away. (We'll go to the Mesa Arizona Temple.) Anyway. GOOD idea.

Then I changed, Taylor changed and he came to pick me up. We went shopping because he needed food and we found a good deal on some good hamburger meat ($1.99 a lb pre patty, vs. $2.99 out of patty). So we ended up buying everything. It was fun to figure out what he wanted to do! So we're going to grill hamburgers, chips and watermelon. (YUM!)

Then dinner. Came back to my place and hung out a bit. Watched some SUV, then decided to go back to Taylor's place because he had to move his car anyway. (Riv tows at 11). Taylor got the game Cribbage on his Droid and I've been playing it so got him hooked. His roommate owns the actual game (mine is in Phoenix.) And he did really well. I ABSOLUTELY enjoyed it. I love playing card games.

To sum up- Taylor is the best fiance ever. Arizona is possible. Life is good.

Pray that we get the apartment we've got our eyes on! It's perfect for us, and we both feel good about it. I'm really, really, really hoping.

Also- TOO MUCH CAFFEINE!

Also- Just had the best moment. One of Aiesha's friends served his mission in Houston South and knows Mimi's father. So we got to talk for a moment. AWESOME.
junipersky: (Flower)
Alright. I've reached the next snag in wedding planning bliss. The wedding is now 48 days away. I have my dress, two weeks I'll take it to mom so she can hem it and my slip. Have the veil. What I need now is to figure out what the heck to do with my hair!!

I know that I need to put it up. Mom and I were fussing with it a little when we got the dress and we both agreed it needed to be up. I almost want just a simple bun at the top of my head, but I think that might look funky with my bangs. I don't want to brush them back, because then my forehead looks big and severe. So I need to find an updo that'll go well with my shoulder-length hair and side swoop bangs. Anyone have any suggestions?
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junipersky: (Default)
Dear Dreamwidth readers,

I would like to introduce you to the newest college graduate (along with the other 6,000+ from BYU). Yes, this is me. I walked across a stage yesterday to accept my Bachelor of Science degree in Elementary Education yesterday. Best part was that I got to walk with my amazing fiance, Taylor. My parents came out and as I had a cousin (Becca) graduating also from the school of communications (like Taylor, but in advertising, not journalism) my Aunt Karen and Uncle Randy were there.

Afterward mom, dad, Jade, Taylor and I went out to go buy wedding stuff and got almost /all/ of the decorations and plates/cups. Forks we're going to be cheap about and go to Costco. (Seriously, they're forks!) Spent almost $550, which as far as I'm concerned is VERY good. Those decorations were for both receptions (Provo and Gypsum.) Mom's still pretty upset about being outside, but as I'm bending on just about everything else she's dealing with it. I mean, if it rains that's my fault. As the average rainfall in Utah in June is .8 of an inch I'm not too worried.

Anyway, our budget for the two receptions is $2000, with the other $3000 going for everything else (from gas expenses, to hotel rooms, etc etc etc.) I'm hoping to come in below budget, but I can only hope. Maybe that'll be nicer for Mom if I can keep the price down.

Anyway, after we bought stuff Taylor and I picked up my Cousin Kim and her friend Ash and we went up to Uncle Bills. (There were too many 'ands' in that sentence.) We got there before my parents and just chilled till they and Aunt Jessica + crowd arrived. Karen, Becca, Randy + Brent (Becca's fiance) all arrived JUST before dinner. (In a public form I will not speculate as to why this is, but I have a few theories.) Nothing too crazy happened. Little cousins jumped me, Taylor helped them to tickle, movies, losing horrible at Mari Wii... (seriously, I suck.)

All in all... a good graduation day. Best part of it was when I got back to Uncle David (and Aunt Jessica's) and CRASHED. I haven't slept that well in a long time. Since coming back from TX I haven't gotten more than 5 hours a sleep a night.

Now I get to move on to bigger and better things. I found someone today to get my invitations done. 450 for $275 which includes the invitations, envelops, design cost and 50 insert cards for those we're inviting to the sealing. They're not going to be the most elaborate because the woman (kinvitations.blogspot.com) only does this for a hobby, but the price is pretty fantastic. She said she'd probably get back to me Monday/Tuesday with a design. I'm VERY stoked because I've been stressing getting these things out!! I might even pay a little more to have the envelopes printed with the return address.

Next week I'm going down to Phoenix for three days. The registration on my car is up this month and as we're moving I don't want to renew the registration in Utah. Better to do it in AZ.

All in all... life is good to me. I'm going to go back to where Taylor's working now though, hang with him a bit longer. I was abortively attempting to make my own invitations because of my frustration.

Here is love. <3 <3 <3 God bless.
junipersky: (Flower)
Dear Dreamwidth,

Holy Heck. I've been in Utah three days now and I feel like my head is spinning. There is SO much to do, and so not enough time to do... anything actually.

My mother is also in town. She came down to do wedding-like stuff with me. Which means it was finally time to face the music that I needed to get things done. Not that I don't want to, but I feel this overwhelming sense of panic everytime I seriously start planning the reception. Lots of peace about the wedding, but lots of panic about the reception.

In which there is a reception. )

Dress talk! )

On to happier things- I have a wedding dress! )

Today ought to be interesting. I bought a nice bra for the dress fitting today (Isn't it nice of them to have a dress fitting open JUST the next day?) but now I cannot find it. On top of that, my wallet is also missing. Mom cannot find it in her car, and it's not in Taylor's apartment. I'm going to go look in 116 again, but I've got a nasty feeling that it and the bra are in the same place. *sighs* Now that I'm looking back, I really should have brought a purse. I've always had my backpack in TX, but here I'm juggling.

Anyway. I'm going to go read my scriptures and try to calm down for the day. I mean, I have my dress. And... everything else will work out, right?

(Oh, and the dress once we get all the accessories and fitting stuff will STILL be under $600. The cheap person in me likes that.) I have pictures, I'll post some day.

Also.. mom made my day.  She called to tell me she was coming and I looked up where she was and was able to get her directions to the freeway.  Being given the chance to feel like I'm actually valuable and that I'm NOT a complete idiot... = awesome. Also, what is up with Mapquest actually deciding to be easy to use? 
junipersky: (sad kitten)
Man... Bishop VanAusdel just got released and they're getting a new bishop. This means that I don't know the bishop I'll be seeing when I get back. I'm... really... really..really... really upset. Sometimes I think the Lord has more confidence in my ability to cope with things then I actually do.

I'm actually really upset right now...

Can't SOMETHING about this engagement be easy? Please?

I'm not alright with this. I'm really not alright with this.
junipersky: (Default)
BWAHAHAHA! I'm trying to use Google Wave to do my wedding planning with my mother.

We'll see if this works. If it does then she, Taylor and I can all have a copy of what we're planning. How do I tell my mother that I want the Provo/Sandy reception to be more formal than the other two? Also, Taylor doesn't /have/ parents, what are we going to do about the Boulder reception? Also... argh! Why do I have to be in Houston? I hope the Lord is willing to give me some clues because I'm struggling right now. :(

In other news- I bought my plane tickets from Houston to SLC. Too expensive. WAY too expensive. $426 for a round trip. If I'd gone the week before the one I want to go it would be $325. That's right, about $100 difference.
junipersky: (Default)
So Taylor 'n I have been engaged for a week and a day now an it feels like forever. I'm suddenly understanding why people have seriously short engagements! All the 'aren't you waiting a bit too long?' comments make SO much more sense now.


Also, plans for xmas break have changed a bit. Rather than go home to Gypsum I'm going to go up through Wyoming and then down to Denver to visit Taylor + family. After that I'll go back to Gypsum. It's crazy to think that I'll only have six days with my family. Jade didn't realize that me going to Texas meant that I wouldn't be there for New Years Eve. A bit distressing actually to let that sink in. New Years has always been a thing for us kids. Before Josh's accident we'd watch movies downstairs. After Josh's accident we gather in his room and watch movies till midnight. (Not the most comfortable arrangement what with the wood floor but...)

It's funny, I don't think that Taylor ever fully realized the fact that we don't have TV at my home. Movies, yes, programing of any sort? No. Internets for the win!

Also, apparently drama has descended in WOah WHAT the HECK format at his apartment. I hope I'm never that crazy! Also, if I ever seem to get crazy 'bout wedding stuff DO kick me please!
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junipersky: (Default)
Dear Dreamwidth:

I love you greatly, did you know that? You make it easy for me to reformat my blog into something uniquely... me. Unfortunately, there is exactly one person who reads said blog. This makes you vastly unimportant unless I wish to post amazing things that only one person will know.

However, you do allow me to cross-post. This cross-posting allows them on Live Journal to read what I have written. This brings my devoted (or not so much) readership up to Two.

So, for the two of you:

Taylor spoke to my father today. Apparently he must have gotten a GLOWING review from my uncle David because Dad talked to him for three minutes before he gave his consent. KJ got more than three minutes. (KJ is my brother-in-law.)

So it is official, all we need now is the ring.

I love life.
-Jamie

p.s. Yes, I'm still moving to Houston in January. Why? I have no idea. But the Lord rarely gives me straight up answers, so when he does tell me to go for something I do it. and he's telling me to get my butt out to Texas.

Wow.
junipersky: (Default)
So not much has changed since the 26th of October. I'm still profoundly super happy. I wake up Smiling and ready to go for goodness sake. There has been talk of rings, and dates, and colours. We might go with dark blue-light blue- white. But we haven't pinned anything down just yet. :D :D :D

There's your hint Mimi, if you read this.
junipersky: (Default)
Wow, talk about a whirlwind day. Today, Kyla Nicole New became Kyla Nicole Herbst. Yep, that's right. The first of my VERY good friends has tied the knot.

I'm happy for her. Dead jealous, yes, but very happy for her. I'll admit, I cried more then a few times, but never enough to smudge my make up too much. Mostly at very sappy times (When she first stepped out with her father, her first dance with Garret, her last dance with her father, cutting the cake, she 'n Garret leaving the reception), so I don't feel to bad about it.

One thing that will always stick in my mind is the prayers. I love Kyla, and almost ever witness I have ever met. But when they pray I almost cringe. I've been thinking about it and I think I have figured out why.

As a very hard and fast rule we avoid the name of deity. (And here I break my own rule, sorry). When we pray it is to "Heavenly Father", when the Witness' pray, it is to "God Jehovah". Both terms (God and Jehovah) are names of deity. And I am uncomfortable with their use in prayer. When I pray, I am praying to my divine father, the God of all the earth. But it is like I am speaking respectfully to him, as a child would to their father. I could no more call Heavenly Father by any of his First Names then I would call my father by his first name. To me, it is pure respect and endearment. I love my father in heaven and I respect him greatly.

I know the Witnesses do not mean any harm or have any other motive when they call upon deity as they do. In fact, I really believe that they are doing it for the same reasons that I do. But oh the difference it makes in the prayers.
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